For me, painting is a way of loving the world I try not to overthink it, less analysis, more doing I have never fully understood money, or what the world calls success But I have made paintings that brought me joy, and that has been enough to keep going Living as an artist is not easy It can be uncertain, sometimes painful The external rewards are small Most of what it gives is internal I have always wanted it enough to continue, even when the path is unclear From the outside, it may look like failure But it can still be a meaningful life A painting takes time I move slowly, letting it unfold I don’t try to control it too much I let the brush and the canvas lead me somewhere I didn’t expect Craft matters, but mostly as a way of sensing when something begins to feel alive Each painting becomes its own small world I went to art school and learned how to think as an artist But I have always simply been a maker I couldn’t help it I loved color And truthfully, I never really learned how to paint in a formal way I kept improvising, following color the way one follows music Color cannot be eaten or drunk It can only be taken in with the eyes Maybe that is part of its mystery Sometimes I look at my work later and it feels unfamiliar I’m not always sure if I like it But I stay curious It often feels like a balance between order and chaos Progress in art is rarely clear It grows slowly, almost quietly, through experience Thinking alone never resolves a painting Something only happens once you begin For me, art is a way of participating in the world A way of paying attention A small connection When I make something or when I encounter art, I come a little closer To others, to the world, to being human In that sense, making art feels like a quiet, generous act N.T. March 2026, Los Angeles, California
photo courtesy of Jeffrey Carrillo, studio-shot, 2026
photo courtesy of Jeffrey Carrillo, studio-shot, 2026
photo courtesy of Jeffrey Carrillo, studio-shot, 2026